I couldn't remember why James wrote me this "I'm sorry Mom" note. I showed the picture to James just now and asked him if he remembered why he wrote it.
He said, "I must have done something terrible."
Awww. I told him that there is nothing so terrible that I wouldn't say "It's okay. You made a mistake. I love you always."
Can a kid hear that enough? I think not.
And really, what could he ever do that would be so terrible? Nothing. He holds our hearts forever.
We're not religious people. Jim and I both grew up Catholic but for whatever reasons it didn't stick and/or I realized my set of beliefs didn't sync up. It almost feels like you shouldn't admit that you don't go to church, or even feel bad about it. My God doesn't mind, that's what I think.
So when James suddenly told us that he believes in God, we were like, "Okay." Don't know where he got it, but we accepted it.
My plan was always for James to explore religion and figure out what's going to stick with him. I thought we'd do a tour of churches but sadly I like to lounge on Sundays. Horrible excuse, I know.
And then one day in August I asked James what he wanted to do that day. He said he wanted to go to church. Who am I to deny that??
The friendliest church I know is in Anoka. I've actually been here with James before, for a Justin's Gift ice cream social. That organization supports our gay students and families. The church also has a huge rainbow banner on its outside, which is excellent. It means they are accepting and loving.
So we went. Mario came with us too. He must believe in God too!
Inside we met an elderly man I explained that I just wanted to show James the church. He seemed prepared to take us into the chapel but I asked to go in alone with James. I want to be the one to answer his questions and start his "journey". It was also going to be our moment.
We talked about why there are churches, why people pray, etc. James said the sweetest prayer, something about hoping that all kids have food and love in the world. I was very proud of him.
And then he wanted to approach the altar. He didin't say much. He just looked and then was satisfied.
He does want to return to church, but doesn't know if he wants to see the "show" (his word, not mine) for up to an hour.
He did get excited when I showed him this hymnal and one of the first pages we see mentions a pure heart. Oh, this boy loves his Mario games and one of the objectives in Super Paper Mario is to collect pure hearts. Surely its a sign!
There was no singing on this fieldtrip.
There really hasn't been a mention of returning to church either, but I'm sure we'll go again some day soon.
The worst part of this experience was going to the Christian store in Blaine. It was musty and crowded with statues of saints. I couldn't find any children's bibles that weren't all hell-bent and full of sins.
I feel like I really need to be selective about what he's going to read. No random books. It's been a lot to think about.
We did purchase a Children's Bible, after I asked a couple of Mom friends for a recommendation. I wanted something fairly non-demoninational and nothing too heavy. He's only 6. So I did find a Bible and James has loved it. We've read through it twice, all the stories of the Old and New testaments.
So James loves God, and God loves him.
We're still not quite sure what to do with all of this, but we are just letting it happen.
As we do each summer, James and I enjoyed a little time on a picnic blanket looking up at the sky. Cloud collecting, 2013!
This year Mario joined us!
Jim captured us from the deck. Sadly, he was working (at home) on such a beatiful day.
That night the sky got all crazy dark and scary.
And then cleared up beautifully.
#Idon'tlikestorms
How have you been able to stand this?! I haven't really blogged since July. I'm looking back on my pictures and found these, that never ever made it to the blog. I'm going to catch up. Really.
This is just a random cute moment. James, probably watching TV, and snuggled up with my Brownie.
James cleaning! He likes to dust. I like to give him quarters. Great teamwork!
I don't know why it's taking me so long to blog about these glorious days.
On this day we headed out for a day of museums! My favorite museum was up first!
We needed to walk through the Tuileries Garden to get to the Musee d'Orsay. It was a huge, grand garden.
Do you see the goats?
People were just lounging, and so early in the morning. 9ish?
Ahhhh! My museum! It used to be a railway station.
And you just don't see knights in crossing signals either!
We found a little place with burgers and salads for dinner. My salad was like no American salad. It was topped with crusty bread and melty fancy cheeses. Even the fries were good!
And just sitting at the outdoor Paris street cafe you see all kinds of things. We ran (ha!) across these running clubs several times in Paris. A group of 100+ runners stampede through, with boomboxes blaring. It looked exhausting. I'd rather walk miles and miles exploring Paris, thanks :)
And the last event of the day was that we returned to our hotel room and were told that there was no power. Yikes! Luckily this happened on the coolest night we'd had yet. The power (and air conditioning) kicked in during the middle of the night. We were probably back in our hotel room by 9pm and with nothing to do (no wifi, TV) and not being able to see well... we opened a bottle of wine and listened to my Rick Steves audio tours on my iPhone. It was actually pretty interesting and useful for our next day. We were headed to Versailles! So we listened to the history and tour beforehand.
What a great day! Looking back on this (nearly three months later) it is just amazing thinking of all we did in one day. Such great memories. Thank you again, Jimmy, and Ana for all of your loving efforts to make our trip a great one!
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